MEN – what are they good for…….

Well to all those ladies/women out there I have been getting short bursts of men today in my head from the past and thought I might as well talk about them from my perspective.

Where is a man when you need one, at the end of the Hire a Hubby phone line – there are so many things I have had to do that were manly that I have forgotten what its like to actually have a man around the house. They are good for a number of reasons least of which is heavy lifting up to and including pouring drinks…..now the idea is WHERE do you GET one FROM?

Been into a couple of computer dating sites and this have proven good and bad. There are thousands of men out there supposedly looking for the right women but goodness me how they email and attack via the net is amazing. I especially don’t enjoy receiving emails from under 40′s (years that is) who say how much they like older women. This just makes me feel creepy but I am polite so send a no thanks email back and then often have to block them as their emails come thick and fast. They take this no thank you email as a YES I’m available for a toy boy……OMG

Company – now I like the company of men (and also women) but where on earth do you find them? Every where I go the more mature males don’t exist or are they all at home doing jobs for their wives (now don’t get me started on those who email who are married – and yes there are many in these sites) or are they just hiding behind closed doors unable to use a computer or dating other women or whatever……men do when they are alone…..lol

How to hook up – well now this is a major dilema when you get through to the stage of a coffee its sink or swim or they don’t look like their photo at all or they don’t think I look like my photo – Oh my its such a difficult experience to go a meet someone for the first time totally unknown to you and make small talk. On the small talk area, this is normally not a problem for me but given the standard of males I do suffer from stage fright and often talk far too much. This is not a good thing probably, but who cares I am who I am and no matter what its me in the end that has to go home and make myself dinner…….no one there to assist by having the dinner on the table waiting for me…does this even happen in our world? It wasn’t part of my old world I did all the jobs that I did and my ex husband did all his…they were split up and even today I don’t know how it happened they just evolved into garbage for him and cooking for me etc. etc.

I have given a lot of thought to the type of man I would like in my life but I keep amending it often as I change daily so the guy in my head has to as well. I don’t even know really what or whom I want so that makes it even harder. It feels like pushing water up hill with a pin. I assume the gentlemen out there are having the same experiences as me and all those other women hunting and gathering men…or trying to are finding it as difficult as I am. Its hard and often frustrating and you feel such a wally about even being in a site let alone sending emails and having to reply if they deem to send one back to you. You can send a kiss, you can send a flirt, you can send an email (only if you are a paid up member) on some sites and it goes on and on……what do they actually mean, thats the burning question? – What is a flirt, does it mean I’m ready to party? or what?

Assimilation what does this actually mean? It means that there are supposedly new and improved ways to do things and they are proving at the moment for me to be extremely difficult I thought I was so cool and able to adjust at the drop of a hat – lol – who knew I have so much baggage it would sink the Titanic again….cabin trunks not just light suitcases. Do you other women out there have this problem as well? I also assume men do as well so its baggage central for us all…. It would be nice to think that there is a man for each of us but then maybe he just needs to be in a cupboard and taken out and dusted off when required. Do they even need to be real? I suppose they do but I’m totally not into trying anymore its just too hard to organise and trying like that Scottish guy over and over and over is becoming boring and off putting.

It has made me laugh often reading the men’s profiles they either say very litle (easy to read) or they also wish for the most exquisit women with so many attributes they would need to be 100 plus years old with every body part of a model with a mentality of a ‘blonde’ and look like Marilyn Munroe or Sophia Loren – nobody seems to want an ordinary person – they all want so much that its impossible to be that person, imagined or real. The long profiles are too much – after the first few lines I’m perspiring and its too hard to focus – so to those blokes out there not every single women in the world likes walks on the beach nor do we like moutain climbing nor do we partake of sport at your level – but then the impossible is always just out of reach, isn’t it?

Deciding what I require or actually wish for or want is also impossible a little bit of every man I’ve ever met put together in one parcel an impossibility but could that be the potential answer. Taking all those I have met over 45 years there has been great, good, bad, ugly, semi-ugly, cute, nice tushed, tall, short, average, above average, totally overwhelming, the luscious, the lusting kind (now thats from my side) and all the potential Tom Cruises or Keanau Reeves can one please mutate and come back to me as one single guy with no baggage and wanting me not to be perfect and take me the way I am warts and all……the impossible dream has to come true. I’m lonely as are many other women and its difficult enough to get through a day alone let alone obtain a guy to share it with you.

Now I’m going to go back up and re-read this – could end up total drivel but I actually don’t care I’m feeling manless and wanting the impossible as usual…so here goes, brb……

Edited and changed a few words here and there but all boils down to one thing – Where is that MAN for me? Sick of hunting them down sick of being vulnerable and sick of being another someone who I actually am not…I think I put on a brave face when in actual fact my insides are scrambled eggs……

Take care, have a fantastic Saturday night…I’m going to watch Spaceballs with John Candy and relive time with my children…..so back to my past, not my future.